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Talk Wrestling Online Community Newsletter #213 - May 3rd, 2009: Origins

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DC

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Talk Wrestling Online Community Newsletter
Issue 213 – May 3rd, 2009

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The Editorial

Welcome, once again, to the only community newsletter that matters, the Talk Wrestling Online Community Newsletter, put together for the people by the people.

In this fortnight's thrilling installment, we have a look at the newest comic-book movie on the block, X-Men Origins: Wolverine, John Hancock brings us more from the wild world of music, the team answer more ridiculous questions, my dear wife interrogates another forum member for the Member's Spotlight, the usual WWE news and results, Laffy's TWO Questions, the thrilling Photoshop League (which is heading into the home straight) and, of course, all the statistics you can handle and more. Oh, and Darkstar warbles on in his own inimitable manner.

We were also going to have a TNA round-up and a look at the general sports scene from around the globe courtesy of JayFunk and Y2James respectively, but, despite promises, nothing has materialised. Pity, because I was looking forward to seeing what they could have produced. The Probe is also AWOL, so we'll have to see if things take an upturn next issue.

Apologies for the newsletter being shorter than normal, but I hope to have things in place to pad out the content in time for the next edition.

What this means is that those positions have re-opened. The newsletter is still looking to add to its staff, so if you want to take on the TNA round-up, General Sports, the Television column or even your own idea for a segment, drop me a PM and we'll sort something out.

DC

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Meet The Team
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1) It's decision time, you have to give up one or the other or you will die. So which do you choose, internet access or your mobile phone? Or, do you simply realise you could never live without them both and choose death?

Kam: Mobile phone, easy choice!
DC: I'd quite happily ditch the mobile phone. I haven't topped it up with credit in about four months and only really use it to play Blockbreaker. I do get free texts now and again from T-Mobile (25 usually), so I use them when I have them, but that's about it.
Nimf: God... Erm... I'd have to say internet. I just couldn't cope without my phone - I use it for so much!
Darkstar: Bye bye mobile phone. I barely use the thing.
ScottyB: It'd have to be my mobile, I use both a lot but I could live without my mobile.
TPIB: If I had to choose which one to give up, it would have to be my cell phone. That's an easy one.
John Hancock: I think, in the panic of the moment, I'd pick one at random, then, at a later date, realise I can't live without either of them, and kill myself. Hold on though, I have an iPhone, so am I allowed to use the internet that's on that as it's technically part of my mobile phone package? (No - it's access to the internet you would be giving up - ed) If I'm allowed that, then I'd give up traditional, computer based internet. If not, it's suicide for me really.
Fiona: Cell phone definitely. Can't even remember the last time I used it. Come to think of it don't even know where it is.
Laffy: It'd have to be my mobile. When I am home, I am on the computer surfing the net constantly. I mainly use my mobile for calling friends, so could go back to using a landline.

2) Due to the recession, the BBC has decided to cut the budget of it's most popular TV shows. One of the shows most affected is Top Gear, meaning the cars being raced around the track by The Stig get no more exotic than the latest Fiat Punto... but that's not enough for The Beeb, oh no, they have also decided one of the three hosts has to go as well. In the interest of fairness, they throw it open to a public vote, which is where you come in. Who has driven their last car?? Which of the three is is getting the bus? Hammond, May or Clarkson... you decide?

Kam: I don't watch Top Gear but I'd go for Mr Hammond...I'm sure he'll have other shows to present.
DC: James May would have to bite the bullet. I think they work well as a trio, but he would be the one who, in my opinion, would be missed the least.
Nimf: May, no contest!
Darkstar: May; all 3 work well together, but his chemistry is the weakest IMO.
ScottyB: James May, I like all 3, but I just happen to like him less than the rest.
TPIB: Though I get BBC America here in the US, I don't watch it. I hate that "How Clean Is Your House?" show. Those ladies sniff toilets and say they stink. They're toilets, they are supposed to stink.
John Hancock: I really want to say Clarkson, because I hate him as a human being, but as a T.V. presenter, he makes that show. I guess it would have to be May. Sorry chap.
Fiona: What the hell is Top Gear?
Laffy: It would have to be James May. I love him, and it would be tough to lose him, but Hammond is sweet and Clarkson is brilliant.

3) Have you ever used a movie quote in a real-life situation? If so, what was the situation and what did you say?

Kam: I know I've said the 'You can't handle the truth' one a few times but it's always just for fun.
DC: I've used movie quotes now and again, usually from Blade or The Crow. "Take your shot, Funboy. You got me dead bang" was used when a guy thought he would try his luck in a fight, "Abashed the Devil stood and felt how awful goodness is" I pulled out when a pretty girl asked me to say something poetic and "Some motherf*ckers are always trying to ice-skate uphill" whenever I see someone trying to do something they just can't.
Nimf: I have actually said "You can't handle the truth"! It was in a huge argument with an ex and I said it. It utterly killed the argument, as we both realised what I'd said and cracked up!!!
Darkstar: I often use the line "I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue" or some variant if somethings odd.
ScottyB: I use movie quotes quite a bit, but I can't recall a situation where I've used one in a serious context.
TPIB: I imagine I have used several movies quotes in my lifetime. I used to say "Alrighty then" all the time when I was younger, as well as some other Ace Ventura lines like "Like a glove" & "R-r-r-r-r-really". I did not need a situation to say it either :).
John Hancock: Technically, a move quote is anything said in a movie, so even "hello" would be a movie quote I guess. Probably the last proper movie quote I used was Hellraiser's "JJJJJJJESUS WWWWWEPT!" which I quite frequently say in the face of some sort of minor inconvenience. Actually, now I think of it, I asked someone if they'd ever seen a grown man naked, which is an Airplane quote. He was a girl I liked's friend, and he was being really annoying and, "Oh, I've done this, and this, and this." If you were wondering, yes, he has seen a grown man naked.
Fiona: No, they copied my quotes. Buggers.
Laffy: I use movie quotes a lot really. The main two that stand out are Forrest Gump’s "Life was like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get" when my cousins and I were trying to get the Golden Kegs from a Quality Street tin only to find them all gone. The other quote I use regularly in various situations is Die Hard's "Yippie-ki-yay, motherf**ker". At one stage, just after the film came out, I used it daily - really did not impress my parents.

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Talk Wrestling Online Subscribers
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Thanks to all the Talk Wrestling Online Subscribers:

Anime_Otaku + Antihero + BRM + Cathal + Chris2K + Darkstar + Fiona + Fletch + Gooneronastick + Inno + Joel + Laffy + MRB + Nemesis Enforcer + Nimf + Omega + Reno + Saz + Shane O Mac + The.Icon + The Maxx + TMJ



Total Subscribers: 22

To find out how you can help support Talk Wrestling Online and become a subscriber see:

* Talk Wrestling Online Subscriber Scheme *

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Talk Wrestling Online Community Update
(Kam)
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Save Yourselves!

I can't even remember the last time I removed the inactive forum accounts here at Talk Wrestling Online...I think it's about time I did!

Currently there are just over 3000 members who have joined and not posted a single post.

I will be removing all member accounts that joined before April 1st 2009 with 0 posts. If you would like to keep your account, just make a post anywhere on the forum before the deadline, there are plenty of discussions to choose from.

Deadline is TODAY!

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Talk Wrestling Online Stats
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MOST ACTIVE THREADS IN THE LAST 14 DAYS:

1. How Are You Today? [General Chat]

2. WWE vs TNA [US Scene Forum]

3. Comments That Don't Require Their Own Thread [US Scene Forum]

4. TWOStars WRESTLENOVA 5 [TWO Stars > Booking and Creative Forum]

5. WWE Backlash 2009 Discussion Thread- April 26, 2009 [US Scene Forum]

6. Wrestlers who you enjoy, but a lot of others don't? [US Scene Forum]

7. WWE UK Tour: DX Invasion and Undertaker's Rest In Peace Tours (November 2009) [US Scene Forum]

8. 5 Things to do Before You Die [General Chat]

9. Mexico flu 'a potential pandemic'! [General Chat]

10. TNA signing former World Champion? [US Scene Forum]

MOST ACTIVE MEMBERS IN THE LAST 7 DAYS:

1. John Hancock
2. DC
3. Nemesis Enforcer
4. The Maxx
5. Gold Shelton
6. TMJ
7. Fiona
8. Omega
9. Jimmy Redman
10. Jay 2 the Funk

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Talk Wrestling Online - Chatroom Information
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WWE Judgment Day PPV Quiz And Chat - Sunday 17th May!

Join us on Sunday 17th May from 9pm UK time for the WWE Judgment Day PPV Quiz and Chat in the TWO Chatroom.

PPV Quiz

The Quiz will take place from 9-10pm in the Quiz Room. The quiz league leaderboard has been updated:

* Quiz Leaderboard *

Quiz participants should pay particular attention to the history of Judgment Day (along with other past wrestling events which took place in May) in order to give themselves an advantage in the quiz. The quiz will be hosted by ME!

Anyone can take part in the quiz, you do not need to register, just turn up in the Quiz Room at 9pm (UK Time).

PPV Chat

The PPV Chat will take place after the quiz, from 10pm to 1am (UK Time). Talk to fellow TWO users about the PPV, and give your thoughts on each match! Discuss it in the TWO Chatrooms!

So don't miss out on a night of fun, join us for the Talk Wrestling Online WWE Judgment Day Quiz and Chat! Don't forget, WWE Judgment Day takes place on Sunday 17th May, and the evening's activities begin from 9pm, starting with the Quiz. We'll see you there, in the chatroom!

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Forum Member's Picks of the Fortnight
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Jobber Joe


~Website~

Outside of TWO, I don't visit many websites. As a general rule, the internet makes me a little bit angry - that probably sounds a bit pretentious, but meh, sorry. If I have to pick something I guess I'll go with www.storywrite.com - it's funny to laugh at young children writing about how difficult the life they haven't lived through is...

~Movie~

I don't know, I took a real proper urge to watch Sweeney Todd a few nights ago so I'll choose that. It's a fantastic movie, beautifully shot with a lot of dark comedy. I am a big sap for musicals and do enjoy Tim Burton when he's on form. Really, it just ticks all the right boxes for me.

~Album~

I am going with Queens of the Stone Age's third album - "Lullabies to Paralyse". This was incredibly controversial when it came out. After the near flawless SFTD, fans were left disappointed, claiming they had lost their way. However, I absolutely adored the slightly deeper, more blues-ey sounding direction they took. Why I've been listening to it? I had been enjoying Songs For The Deaf and got a bit tired but wanted more Josh Homme goodness. I simply moved on and haven't looked back yet.

~Book~

I think I'm going to go with Plato's "Republic". My girlfriend bought it for m'Christmas and so have only just got round to it. It's been a cracking read - although I'm not hugely far in yet. I've also been enjoying A.J Ayer's "Language, Truth & Logic" but that's mainly for Uni - it's fairly difficult but I adore his brash attitude towards all things he doesn't agree with.


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Movie Mayhem
(DC)
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X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Directed by: Gavin Hood
Written by: David Benioff and Skip Woods
Rated: 12A (UK) PG-13 (US)
Running time: 107mins
Release: Out now

Cast

Hugh Jackman - Logan/Wolverine
Liev Schreiber - Victor Creed
Danny Huston - William Stryker
Will i Am - John Wraith
Lynn Collins - Kayla Silverfox
Kevin Durand - Frederick J. Dukes/The Blob
Dominic Monaghan - Chris Bradley/Bolt
Taylor Kitsch - Remy LeBeau/Gambit
Daniel Henney - David North/Agent Zero
Ryan Reynolds - Wade Wilson/Deadpool
Scott Adkins - Weapon XI
Tim Pocock - Scott Summers


There has been a lot of hype surrounding this movie, even prior to it being officially announced. There were a few "Origin" films bandied about (Magneto, Xavier, the original X-Team), but with Wolverine being the main character from the original trilogy, it makes perfect sense for him to be the subject of the first prequel.

While Hugh Jackman was always going to play the lead, the remainder of the cast was a hot topic. Everyone and their dog wanted Ryan Reynolds to play Deadpool (even before the character was confirmed as being in the movie - he and Wolverine have a history) and, alongide Wesley Snipes with Blade, became only the second actor to bag a Marvel character without having to do an audition.


Liev Shreiber was first linked with the part of William Stryker, but when reading the script, fought to get the role of Creed instead. Not having the requisite size to be convincing against Jackman's feral hero, the producers wanted him to wear a muscle suit along the lines of the outfit Vinnie Jones wore for his role as Juggernaut. Shreiber, finding the idea humiliating, he asked for time to add the required bulk to his frame and, over the course of the next 4-5mths, added 35lbs of muscle, leaving him needing to buy new clothes due to his back gaining a few inches across.

Danny Huston, who plays the role Liev was originally cast for, was going to come in as Mr. Sinister (in a very early draft of the script), but the character was purged due to his story arc being too closely linked to Cyclops and Jean Grey, while Dominic Monaghan, of Lost fame, was slated to play a mutant called Beak, but had his character changed to Bolt very late in the day.

The biggest cheer was reserved for the news that Gambit would finally make an appearance in an X-Men movie after being teased in X-Men II (his name is on a list of mutants Mystique looks at in Stryker's base). Relative unkown, Taylor Kitsch brings Reme LeBeau (his surname translates as "The Handsome" in English) to life and, from all accounts, is very good at it.

Other mutants making their debuts include The Blob (although, there was an uncredited appearance by a man who looked like Blob in X-Men - The Last Stand), Wraith (can teleport), Agent Zero (who isn't really a mutant and will later go by the name of Maverick), Silver Fox, Weapon XI and Emma Frost. Cyclops also appears in the movie as a high school. version of the character in the main trilogy and, from various rumours and fuzzy stills, it also looks like Banshee is in ther as well.


There have been numerious trailers and TV spots, as well as teasers and other methods of building hype. It was always said that Hugh Jackman and Wolverine carried the original trilogy and this time out, as star AND producer, Jackman really is carrying the movie.

All that remains to be seen is whether the film can live up to the hype and the hope heaped upon it. A second Wolverine prequel, not to mention the Magneto origin story and the mooted Young X-Men all depend on it.

So far, the reviews haven't been that kind, with Empire giving it a two-star review and Total Film giving it three stars. They both said that the movie itself is good, but that it seems rushed and some aspects are skipped over too quickly, leaving the viewers unfulfilled. I'm off to see it tonight (Friday), so we'll see if my review is any better.

[YOUTUBE]<object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/DOz8Bo5X9vA&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/DOz8Bo5X9vA&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object>[/YOUTUBE]
Official Website


Review

Well, did the movie live up to the hype? The true answer is no... but Gavin Hood, Hugh Jackman and the rest of the cast and crew give it a damn good try. The main problem is, because the film is an origin story, there is a lot of exposition and "finding yourself" before the action kicks in good and proper. That's not to say there isn't great action in the film (the opening scene with the credits running is peppered with great action as we follow Victor Creed and James Logan (later to be Sabretooth and Wolverine), half-brothers, running away from home as kids and flawlessly filtering to shots of them both as adults fighting in the American Civil War, World War i, World War II and Vietnam. It's a really well shot and edited scene and, without having any real dialogue, lets the audience see the bond between Creed and Logan and how close they are as brothers.

From there, William Stryker is introduced and, similar to the Star Wars prequels, a lot of the enjoyment is knowing where these characters end up and watching them get there. With plenty of nods to things in the later movies, this is a nice little treat.

After Stryker is introduced and makes the offer shown in the trailer ("I'm putting together a special team, special priveliges...", things skip forward and we are introduced to the rest of the team; John Wraith (teleporter), Bolt (can control electrics), a not-obese, just solidly built, Frank Dukes (superstrong and indestructible), Agent Zero (very acrobatic and astounding with guns) and Wade Wilson (superpowered mouth and sense of sarcasm... oh, and a master acrobat, hand-to-hand fighter and swordsman - he can cut a bullet in two mid-flight). The scene where the team have their first on-screen mission is an astounding introduction and really show that Ryan Reynolds as the future Deadpool just oozes the right qualities to take the lead in the mooted spin-off.

After this intense opening however, things slow down as Logan leaves the group and tries to live a normal life with Kayla Silverfox (she has the power of persuasion over anyone she has physical contact with). These scenes, while important to establish what Wolverine has lost, slow down the pace of the film and leave you itching for the next action sequence.

Once this happens though, the film doesn't really let up until the closing credits. People die that you genuinely don't want to die and the fight scenes are as brutal as they could get away with in a 12A movie (there were at least four parents who took their kids out of the cinema, with one going during the brutality of the opening credits - I bet she was popular when they got back home). Wolverine v Creed, the central battle throughout the movie, is a glorious sight, with Leiv Schreiber as Sabretooth being a revelation. As an outside bet, he could easily carry a stand-alone movie for the ying to Logan's yang.

Gambit, another fan favourite, is translated as well as could be expected, although his screen time is brief (but, to be fair, it is a Wolverine movie), but memorable. Other mutants get minor cameos (Toad, Quicksilver, Banshee, Storm) while Scott Summers gets a more high-profile role... and for those wondering why Cyclops doesn't remember Wolverine when the events of the first movie comes around (something I was wondering myself), the writers have a very simple, but very ingenious method to get around that plot point. There is also a nice link to the files seen in X2 of all the mutant names Stryker has, as they were all either employed by him or captured by him in this film.

I was astounded by how easy, and logical it all was... and, to cap it off, after the final battle with Weapon XI (which is, like all the other fights, stunningly awesome), a scene-stealing cameo by an old favourite walking in at the end leaves us all happy mutant-loving campers.

The film is by no means flawless, but as a starting point, any sequels look to be in good hands and the spin-off origin stories based on Magneto and the First X-Team seem to be a certainty.

I recommend it, although it never reaches the heights of the first two X-Men movies, and advise you to stay after the credits for the two additional scenes (only one per showing) that have...

*MAJOR SPOILER ALERT*​
... either Wolverine in Japan, setting up some story arcs set there or, and this is the one you want to see, Deadpool reaching out for his severed head, opening his eyes and whispering "SSSSSSH!" to the audience watching. THEY HAVE DEADPOOL BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL, JUST LIKE IN THE COMICS!!! To say I was excited is an understatement.

Roll on the sequels...

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Member Spotlight
(Nimf)
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Anime Otaku

SO, WHO ARE YOU AND HOW'D YOU GET HERE?
I'm Anime_Otaku, formerly Tajiri_san, and I got here via the old Smash Wrestling chatrooms

HOW DID YOU GET INTO WRESTLING?
I became a fan in the late eighties after seeing it the then WWF on Sky at either a friend or relatives house, I don't remember which.

WHO DO YOU THINK SHOULD CURRENTLY HAVE THE MAIN TITLES ON ECW, SMACKDOWN, RAW AND TNA?
I've only been watching sporadically so I can't really say, though Edge is doing well.

HAVE YOU EVER MET ANY WRESTLERS-IF SO, WHO?
I met Brian Knobs outside the SECC during the WWF European tour in either 90 or 91

WHAT ABOUT WRESTLING/WRESTLERS/WRESTLING FANS ANNOYS YOU THE MOST?
Nothing. Usually if a fan's annoying, they are just annoying in general as a person.

SO FAR, WHAT HAS BEEN YOUR MATCH OF THE YEAR?
Haven't watched enough to say, maybe when Jeff Hardy won the title if that was this year.

WHAT HAS BEEN YOUR FAVOURITE PROMO/BACKSTAGE MOMENT?
Recently on Raw when Cena was confronted in the ring by Edge, Vicki Guerrero and Big Show and said to Edge (paraphrasing) "You've got a 420 pound monster backing you up... and Big Show is here too."
If you mean ever, either a D-X promo (any one, they were pretty much all good) or The Rock's "Die Rocky Die" promo/heel turn.

IF YOU COULD START A CHANT AT A WRESTLING SHOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
I've no idea, I'd probably be to shy to try. :lol:

DO YOU HAVE AN ALL TIME FAVOURITE CLIQUE/ALLIANCE?
I'd probably go with D-X, they were really, really funny.

FANTASY 6 MAN MINI RUMBLE-WHO WOULD YOU HAVE IN IT AND WHO WOULD WIN?
I'm going to assume 'Man' is generic and say: Gail Kim, Mickie James (in crazy heel mode), Trish Stratus, Awesome Kong, Kaoru and Aja Kong. Winner: The fans... and Trish Stratus

WHAT IS THE LAST TEXT YOU RECEIVED AND WHO WAS IT FROM?
I don't have a mobile

FANTASY JOB?
Actor, something in entertainment, sit down comedian would be good too.

WHISTLE-STOP TOUR OF THE WORLD-WHAT 3 COUNTRIES/PLACES WOULD YOU HAVE TO VISIT?
Tokyo, Hong Kong and Beijing

IF YOU COULD MEET ANYBODY, PAST OR PRESENT, WHO WOULD IT BE?
Either Winston Churchill or Ai Kago (actually all of Morning Musume's 4th generation but Aibon most of all. :D)

WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST MEMORY?
Being in hospital before having open heart surgery age 4 and a half

WHAT WERE/ARE YOUR FAVOURITE AND LEAST FAVOURITE SCHOOL SUBJECTS?
English and Maths

WHICH OF THE 7 DEADLY SINS DO YOU THINK YOU 'FALL' TO THE MOST?
Sloth

WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD,WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU WERE ALL GROWN UP?
Lots of things at various times: Doctor, Mechanic, Actor, Translator and Stuntman are ones I remember.

IF YOU COULD STAR IN ANY MOVIE IN ANY ROLE, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Just one?! Marv in Sin City.

WHAT 3 THINGS WOULD YOU SAVE FROM YOUR HOME IN AN EMERGENCY (OTHER THAN FAMILY AND PETS OF COURSE!)
My Laptop, My iPod... can't think of a third thing.

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GhettoBlastin'
(John Hancock)
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Ah, the difficult second album. Oh well, let's power on.

This Month In Rock

This month... well... erm... well, nothing happened really. Wait. Do Coldplay count as rock? No? Well shut up, because they do now.

Everyone's favourite breakcore, emo-war, nintendo-punk (yes, those are all real genres by the way) superstars, Coldplay, have announced a free album. Well... sorta. This new album is in fact just a live album, which means it's old songs people already own, but with added feedback, tired vocals, no production and background noise... and you only get it if you go to one of their concerts, which is pretty much saying that, if you march through an ants nest smeared in honey, you get a free pen. If you feel like marching through this proverbial ants nest, you can watch Coldplay at Wembley Arena, with support from... Jay Z? Really? And who else? NO WAY!? Girls Aloud! Sign me up!

In more rawking news, everyone's favourite virgins, The Jonas Brothers, will be touring in the U.K. for the first time. Cue screams. The Christian extremist trio will be faux-rocking their way through Manchester, Newcastle, Birmingham and London in November. Support is from some other random Disney singer who I can't be bothered to really remember.

In kinda cool news, No Doubt are back. It begs the question, what exactly have the other members been doing for the past five years? Not to worry though, they're back now. They played their first ever gig together in five years on Friday in New York City, and have announced they'll be busting out a world tour this Summer, so keep your ears and eyes open for that.

In even cooler news, Joel Madden, the slightly less fat, but still really very fat one from Good Charlotte was denied access to a plane because his sleeves weren't long enough. No, seriously. Apparently, sleeve tattoos are still taboo on British Airways, which is apparently run by some sort of outraged Victorian gentleman, demanding table legs be covered lest he develop an erection. Joeley-Poley was ordered to get himself some longer sleeves to cover his offensive tattoos before he was allowed on the plane. Normal, I'd be outraged at such nit-picking stupidity, but I really hate Joel Madden, so it's funny.

I've always thought that being forced to watch an Aerosmith concert would be an adequate punishment for a crime, but it seems playing an Aerosmith concert is also a perfectly good punishment. Last year, the ancient rockers canceled a gig in Hawaii that led to a massive lawsuit from the fans, many of whom had bought plane tickets to Hawaii specifically to see the gig. A court deemed that Steve Tyler and co's punishment was not only to play a gig, but also to pay everyone's travel expenses. Poor people, they were so close to avoiding seeing Aerosmith too...


This Month In Rap

Abrasive North London rap elves, N-Dubs have been announced as the headliners for this years Love Music Hate Racism gig in Stoke. Love Music Hate Racism are an organistion connected to the left-wing United Against Fascism who combat racial prejudice by... erm... playing some music to people in a field. Row, row, fight the power.

WWWWWWWWEDDING NEWS! Well. More marriage news I guess. Actually, it's end of marriage news, but shouting "DDDDDDDDDIVORCE NEWS!" doesn't really have the same twang to it does it? This months big break up is Kelis, who's milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, if you remember, and Nas, who's irreconcilable differences bring court papers to his attorney. The two have been married for four years, and dating for seven.

This year hasn't been a great one for the lovely Rihanna. First off, she got hospitalised after her boyfriend Chris Brown, for lack of a better word, beat the living sh*t out of her, and secondly... well... nothing, but come on, getting beaten by your boyfriend's enough by itself to ruin your year. Anyway, things got slightly better this month, after the police finally gave back the $1,400,000 worth of jewelry that Rihanna was wearing the night of said sh*t beating. The problem was that, like most red carpet walkers, Rihanna hadn't bought the jewelry, she had simply borrowed it from the manufacturer as part of a promotion. When the RnB superstar went to the police, the jewelry was seized as evidence, understandably winding up the jewelry companies a little bit. But not to worry, all's sorted now.


This Month In Pop

WWWWWWWWEDDING NEWS! Alright, not totally true, it's honeymoon news. But it's awesome honeymoon news. Hills stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt (the most deserved second name in history) have, to quote MTV News, "FLED", that's right, "FLED" Mexico. Why? All together now:

SWINE FLU!

The deadly T-Virus has so far killed 19 people this year (499,981 less than normal flu, by the way).

In more illness related news, Prince came out of the closet as an epileptic. Well, no, I didn't think that was news either, but all the entertainment sites did, so maybe you will too. How am I supposed to know what you people want?


Feature - The Next Big Thing

This was sparked by a nice little discussion last week about who will be the next big thing. Well, here's my picks.

The Cab

Who? - Nevadan pop punks who formed in 2004 in their home town of Las Vegas. The Alternative Press recently named them "the band you NEED to know".

Why? - Where to start? They're young, handsome, Christian, and signed to Fueled By Ramon Records, the hottest record label on the emo/punk scene right now, responsible for the careers of Fall Out Boy, Paramore, The Academy Is, Panic At The Disco, Gym Class Heroes and Cobra Starship. The band have already toured with such genre heavyweights as Plain White T's, Panic At The Disco, Forever The Sickest Kids, The Hush Sound and Metro Station. Add to that that their debut album features guest appearances from the lead singers of both Panic At The Disco and Fall Out Boy. Fall Out Boy vocalist Patrick Stump also helped out with a few of the songs. With such pop-punk royalty backing them, how can they fail?

[YOUTUBE]<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/r_dwiC6yEzQ&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/r_dwiC6yEzQ&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>[/YOUTUBE]​

Lupe Fiasco

Who? - Grammy award winning Chicago born rapper, producer, singer, CEO and general self made man, Wasalu Jaco. Critics have already labeled him "The next generation's hip-hop vanguard".

Why? - He's already huge in America, which means the U.K.'s only a matter of time. Lupe himself has stated how much he hates the violence and bigotry of modern hip-hop, and he goes out of his way to defy it, earning him a lot of respect from hip hop's old guard, as well as a massive amount of market ability from family friendly music giants like MTV and most radio stations. He's also got more celebrity endorsements than cocaine. Amongst his fans are Rihanna, Pharrell Williams, Lil Wayne, Kay Z, Kanye West, Linkin Park, Fall Out Boy and The Beastie Boys. Expect greatness.

[YOUTUBE]<object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/eIAkTiWuCk0&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/eIAkTiWuCk0&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object>[/YOUTUBE]​

Miley Cyrus

Who? - Don't pretend you don't know. She's the 16yr old borderline billionaire daughter of country mega-star Billy Ray Cyrus.

Why? - Again, don't pretend you don't know. This woman RUNS America, just runs the place. And now she's got her eyes set on the United Kingdom. Recently, Hannah Montana The Movie (a feature length version of the Disney show that she made her name with) came to these shores to massive fan fare from the tweenage market. Her music is already being pumped around London's gay clubs and, if I know anything about pop, that means it'll be in the straight clubs soon enough. This woman will take over everything.

[YOUTUBE]<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Hr0Wv5DJhuk&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Hr0Wv5DJhuk&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>[/YOUTUBE]


---------------------------------------------------------------
Quote, Unquote
(Fiona)
---------------------------------------------------------------



Well it's been a busy month here on the forum, what with all the pay-per-views, the Draft and so on and so forth. But screw all of it, silly is where it is and where it's at. The minds of our forum members seem to be working overtime... or not at all. You be the judge.

Before we start a big shout out to John Hancock, BRM and Dave7G. All these guys came to my rescue by helping me troll their forums for the following quotes. Thanks again.
Did the beard get drafted along with Konx? because with Hornswoggle on his own on Raw i'd love to see:

Knox beard vs Hornswoggle
Nem is frustrated by the fact that Knox's beard is clearly more manly than he is. Hence the beat down.
Standing over them and just pounding their face is fun.
TGO's describes his First Aid classes.
Braindead! I want to kick ass for the Lord.
Jaycey Baby embarrasses himself on Songs of Praise... again!
I'm trying to find the video of a really small ladder having a massive unbeaten streak in DDT. It's basically people trying to do moves on the ladder, and thus injuring themselves, causing the ladder to fall on them, and pin them. The ladder was champion for about a year, before it was beaten by a chair that fell on it. The chair had a less impressive winning streak before it was beaten by a nine year old girl who (in kayfabe) had ridiculously strong arms, and could chokeslam pretty much anyone.
Apparently fed up with what the WWE is producing, JRock turns to inanimate objects to feed his wrestling obsession.
we're all watching oiled up musclely guys grappling with each other and grunting. In short people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones :)
Hitman08 trying to convince himself of his metro-sexuality.
For me forgetting a question mark in your first post is instant forum death.... ;)
Just Omega's unique way of welcoming new forum members. What a guy.
Trust me, nobody hates The Sun more than me. I read The Times but saw the story and thought it was and interesting and could generate some interesting discussion, but obviously not.
Well Y2James has just proved that he's smarter than 99.9% of the forum by reading The Times.
Had the voting taken place after Febuary then i suspect that it would of been between Vidic and Gerrard, as it happens for some bizarre reason the votes are counted back in Febuary. This seems to have worked in favour of Giggs.
BRM concludes that voting for this years PFA awards is indeed flawed and that he would do a much better job running the PFA.

And just to finish up, the last two posts are typical of the silliness that's invaded the forum this month.
:omg: I didn't create the name internet wrestling fan.

Someone else on this thread did. You a full time or part time comedian?
Neither. I'm a full time smart ass and part time asshole.

Take your pick as to what I was being there. You'll still be wrong.

:omg: :rolleyes2:
Well that's all she wrote for another newsletter. See you next time.

---------------------------------------------------------------
Blabbermouth
(Darkstar)
---------------------------------------------------------------



I Don’t Half Ramble On


So, today I had a crisp. I know, not normally something worth talking about in the newsletter. BUT… I was eating them while walking around the shops, I pulled one out and SHOCK HORROR it looked like a rather intimate part of the female anatomy. Amused I ate it before exclaiming ‘I just had a crispy vagina!’

Yeah, one day I will take the wife shopping without it ending up in her being forced into a discussion with middle aged women about thrush.

Anyhoo, this weeks article is inspired by DCs movie thingy. Let’s discuss superhero powers…

Laser Vision

As made famous by Superman.

Ok, being able to blast people with heat and laser blasts from your eyes is rather cool, who hasn’t wanted to hunt down David Platt and incinerate the little goon? And it’s as easy to use as focussing your eyes. Isn’t it?

Well I don’t know about you but sometimes in the morning it takes a few seconds to focus, and sometimes on a sunny day I have to squint a little. Now if part of that focusing is the laser activation you wake up to find burn marks in your bedroom wall and a dead next door neighbour. Or the hay fever leads to a splattered bunny rabbit or two. Not great that. Still, it can only get better from here, right?

Claws


As made famous by Wolverine.

Mwhahahahaha. Sssshting. Ugh.

That’s the evil laugh followed by the claws coming out and being stabbed into the chest of an unsuspecting bank guard.
How cool are claws? You just flex and they pop out ready for use, several inches of razor sharp claw or metal able to cut through anything.

Including any part of your body you’re in the middle of scratching. Such as nose, or belly or …, well, you know where else. See most muscles do more than one thing, movements in degrees and in partnership with other muscles and so forth. One accidental twitch and you won’t ever be twitching it again!

Super Strength


OK, not quite the picture I was looking for.

Made famous by The Incredible Hulk

Being super strong is a dream for the geeks of the world, no more being picked on by by bullies at the beach! Actually being able to open a jar of your moisturiser!

On the other hand, have you ever put that little bit too much force into something? Maybe opening crisps, and they have gone everywhere right. Now add super strength and replace crisp packet with shop door. Or the remote for the TV. Or try to use a spray deodorant.
That’s right, your super power has made you unable to even use a spray can. Or a tap! My God do you stink…

Invisibility


Yeah, there’s a picture there.

Made famous by The Invisible Man. OK that was a cop out.

So, you turn invisible right, maybe it’s a scientific experiment or maybe juts some odd glowing ooze. So what do you do? Get money from a bank? Or spy on a changing room? Maybe both.

However, what then? You have to wonder about naked, if you put any clothes on (you know, to keep warm) you can be seen. Heck you can’t even put on shoes, so watch out for sharp stones, glass and slugs. OK a slug isn’t sharp, but do you want one squidging between your toes? And if you eat stuff, can that be seen in mid air? Oh crap, and having, well, a crap, would freak you the hell out!

So, that sucks doesn’t it? Mutant powers sure do have drawbacks.

Se you all next week.
DS

---------------------------------------------------------------
Talk Wrestling Online Photoshop League
(ScottyB)
---------------------------------------------------------------



Welcome to the fifth edition of TWO’s Photoshop League.
First of all, a big thank you to everyone who entered.
For the first time in the history of the photoshop league we have 4 people tied in third place.

The three words this week were:

Aeroplane + Goose + Chocolate
And here are the winners :)

In third came this picture from Saz!.


And this picture from Laffy!


And this picture from Darkstar!


And this picture from Fiona!


In second came this picture from Nemesis Enforcer!.


And finally, the winner of Week 4 is *Drum Roll*
Dr Zero!

And here is his winning entry!


This means the leader board looks like this.

Dr Zero.................................18
Nemesis Enforcer....................16
Laffy...................................11
Saz......................................8
Darkstar...............................8
Fiona...................................7
Y2James...............................2
ShaolinHandLock.....................1


And now for week 5!
This weeks words are:
Shotgun + Trophy + Ninja

*DEADLINE = 10th Mayl*

A quick reminder on the rules:

• No distorting the forum.
• Nothing that goes against TWO’s rules or policies, so no inappropriate content.
• Images must be uploaded via www.imageshack.us, www.photobucket.com or www.tinypic.com
• A link or the actual picture sent to me via Personal Message.
• Entries can be either drawn completely or have all of the three items imported as a picture.
Don’t forget that if you finish 1st, 2nd or 3rd in the league you can win some prizes!

1st – A £20 gift voucher for an online store

2nd- A £10 gift voucher for an online store

3rd- A TalkWrestlingOnline.Com Retro T-Shirt​

For a complete look at the rules please check out the first edition of the league!
---------------------------------------------------------------
Wrestling 101 Info Centre
---------------------------------------------------------------




Latest Wrestling 101 Articles:

> The Road Through the Past: WWE Backlash 2002

> Before They Were Wrestling Stars: Rey Misterio, Jr. DVD Review

Latest Wrestling 101 Blogs:

> SSP: My WWE WrestleMania 25 Weekend

> CBlog XXXIX- Thoughts On 2009 WWE Draft and WWE Backlash Predictions

---------------------------------------------------------------
This Week in WWE
(TPIB)
---------------------------------------------------------------



WWE Backlash 2009 Match Results

The eleventh annual WWE Backlash came to you, live on pay-per-view, from the Dunkin' Donuts Center in Providence, RI.

  • ECW Championship: Christian def. Jack Swagger (c) by pin following the Killswitch to win the ECW Title.
  • Chris Jericho def. Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat by submission to the Walls of Jericho.
  • Kane def. CM Punk by pin following a modified Big Red Chokeslam.
  • "I Quit" Match: Jeff Hardy (SD) def. Matt Hardy (RAW)
  • Winner Earns Title of "Miss WrestleMania": Santina Marella def. Beth Phoenix by pin after The Great Khali hit Beth Phoenix on the top of the head and pushed her down.
  • WWE Championship: 6-Man Tag: Legacy def. Triple H (c), Batista, & Shane McMahon by Randy Orton pinning Triple H (c) following the Orton Punt; Randy Orton wins the WWE Title.
  • World Heavyweight Championship: Last Man Standing Match: Edge (SD) (with Big Show) def. John Cena (RAW) to win the World Heavyweight Title.

WWE RAW April 27, 2009 Match Results

The 831st edition of Monday Night RAW came to you, live, from the Arena at Harbor Yard in Bridgeport, CT.

  • Kofi Kingston def. The Brian Kendrick by pin following Trouble in Paradise.
  • 8-Diva Tag: Santina Marella, Mickie James, Brie Bella, & Kelly Kelly (with Nikki Bella & Hornswoggle) def. Maryse, Beth Phoenix, Rosa Mendes, & Jillian by Santina Marella rolling up Jillian.
  • Matt Hardy def. Goldust by pin following a shot with his cast.
  • Champion Vs. Champion: Non-Title: Randy Orton & MVP fight to a No Contest after Shane McMahon attacks Randy Orton.
  • Non-Title: Primo & Carlito def. Chavo Guerrero & Jamie Noble by Carlito pinning Jamie Noble following the Back Stabber.
  • #1 Contender's Match for the WWE Title at Judgment Day: Batista (with John Cena) def. Big Show by Count-Out to become the #1 Contender for the WWE Title at Judgment Day.
Notes

It was announced on RAW that WWE Champion Randy Orton will face Shane McMahon in a non-title match on next week's RAW.

ECW April 28, 2009 Match Results

The 151st edition of ECW on Sci-Fi came to you, live, from Madison Square Garden in New York City, NY.

  • Tyson Kidd (with Natalya) def. Finlay by pin following a shillelagh shot to the back of the knee.
  • ECW Championship: Tommy Dreamer def. Christian (c) by DQ when Jack Swagger attacks Tommy Dreamer; Christian (c) retains.
Notes

Starting with next week's show, ECW will be moving back to the 10/9c time slot.

It was announced on ECW that Christian will defend the ECW Title against former champion Jack Swagger at Judgment Day.

WWE Superstars April 30, 2009 Match Results

The third edition of WWE Superstars came to you from the Arena at Harbor Yard in Bridgeport, CT and Madison Square Garden in New York City, NY.

  • Michelle McCool & Alicia Fox def. Gail Kim & Maria by Michelle McCool pinning Gail Kim following a mid-air big boot.
  • Evan Bourne def. Paul Burchill (with Katie Lea Burchill) by pin following Air Bourne.
  • Ted DiBiase def. Carlito by pin following Dream Street.

WWE SmackDown May 1, 2009 Match Results

The 506th edition of WWE SmackDown came to you from Madison Square Garden in New York City, NY.

  • John Morrison def. Shelton Benjamin by pin following the Moonlight Drive.
  • #1 Contender's Fatal 4-Way Elimination Match: Jeff Hardy def. Kane, Chris Jericho, & Rey Mysterio (in that order) to become the #1 Contender for the World Heavyweight Title.
  • Brooklyn Breakdown Dance-Off: Eve def. Layla
  • United States Championship: MVP (c) (RAW) (with Sherri Shepherd) def. Dolph Ziggler (SD) by pin following the Playmaker to retain.
  • Non-Title: CM Punk def. Edge by pin following the GTS.
Notes

As a result of winning the Fatal 4-Way Elimination Match, Jeff Hardy will challenge Edge for the World Heavyweight Title at Judgment Day on May 17.

United States Champion MVP will be a special guest on "The View" this Monday morning.

The order of elimination for the Fatal 4-Way Elimination Match was as follows:

1. Chris Jericho elim. Kane by pin following the Swanton Bomb by Jeff Hardy.
2. Rey Mysterio elim. Chris Jericho by DQ following a mid-air chair shot.
3. Jeff Hardy elim. Rey Mysterio with a roll-up counter after Rey Mysterio hit Droppin' Da Dime on Jeff Hardy.

---------------------------------------------------------------
TWO Questions
(Laffy)
---------------------------------------------------------------



This weeks questions:

1. Who is your Wrestler of the Fortnight?
2. Which wrestling move/hold is your favourite and why?

GoldSheldon
Wrestler of the Fortnight - Jack Swagger is my wrestler of the fortnight. What a performance at Backlash. Definately a hot prospect for the future. Way more entertaining to watch than Orton or HHH. Lets hope the WWE don't rush him into winning the Heavyweight title too soon though!
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x94sj0_backlash-2009-part1_sport

Favourite Move/Hold - My Favourite move/hold changes all the time. I love the Sharpshooter but at the moment my favourite is Goldust's Shattered Dreams. He makes kicking people in the nuts look so classy and cool. What a wrestler Goldust is.


Shane O Mac
Wrestler of the Fortnight - Edge/Cena. Both had some fantastic matches over here on the Revenge Tour (mostly together) and the Last Man Standing match at Backlash... nothing else to add!

Favourite Move/Hold - The punt... we've all seen the results of it, really don't think anyone else could pull it off as well as Orton does.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcUqG343lq4


Inno
Wrestler of the Fortnight - Edge for me. I've said it to anyone that'll listen (which granted, ain't many these days) that Edge is the top guy in the WWE. He brings the goods in the ring, on the stick, wherever needed. He just reeks of awesomeness right now, and deserves a long run with the belt. Hopefully some E&C goodness in the future too.

Part One
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fVs4u_xIGHg
Part Two
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_A91ZiZYLU

Favourite Move/Hold - Favourite move is still, without doubt, the Razor's Edge - absolutely love it, always have. Hold wise, can't beat the Tazmission when Taz was at his absolute peak - they built that hold as a killer and really looked the business.


Laffy
Wrestler of the Fortnight - Surprisingly this week it was The Miz; when he first debuted with the stupid braces and the ridiculous trousers I used to watch his matches just to hear JBL’s comments. I knew The Miz had got better under the guidance of Morrison but it still surprised me how good he was.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJjmuzDMYAg

Favourite Move/Hold - I love Jeff’s Swanton Bomb as it almost seems he will kill himself every time it is performed. I also love the silly moves like The Worm, The Peoples Elbow and The Five Knuckle Shuffle.

--------------------------------------------------------------
Final Thoughts
--------------------------------------------------------------

Another edition into the books, destined to drift down the thread listings until it falls off the bottom of page one and into the abyss that is page two. Hopefully, some archeoligically minded new members, in years to come, will venture into the unknown and unearth this edition like it's a time-capsule of a bygone era.

I hope you enjoyed the columns and that you all have a fantastic bank holiday Monday. Me? I'm working, but at least it's double-time.

See you all in fourteen days.

Newsletter Editor:
DC



---------------------------------------------------------------
Contributors
---------------------------------------------------------------


Thanks to everybody who contributed to this issue of the TWO Newsletter:

NEXT EDITION: Sunday 17th May
 
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Maxximus

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Wow. Short and to the point. Good job to everyone involved. My only question is, what happened to "The Probe?"
 

Twig

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Wow. Short and to the point. Good job to everyone involved. My only question is, what happened to "The Probe?"
OMAR DAYS happened. Basically it got too rough, started fights, factions were formed, lines were drawn, then crossed, and shit went down... Sorta.
 

John Hancock

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OMAR DAYS happened. Basically it got too rough, started fights, factions were formed, lines were drawn, then crossed, and shit went down... Sorta.
It's actually come back since all that silliness. Mitch does it now, and does a fine job.
 

The GS

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Damn! My silly quote on the newsletter really looks really silly. I think I wrote that when I came home from a long car journey and was tired and I must've misread the persons post I was replying to. Damn it looks really bad. I can barely remember typing that post at all. Why would I say "Someone else on this thread did (create the name internet wrestling fan)". I must've been tired and not concentrating. It looks really bad.
 
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